Beliefs, myths, Religion and its impact on the society

I fondly recall the early 80s of Chennai Cinema when Stalwart directors like K Balachander made movies that often stirred some controversies and made people debate over it.  Door Darshan was the only channel that encashed this time slot and consumed most of the Sunday afternoons that forced people to sit in front of the idiot box and hear people debating if what Sujatha did in "Aval Oru Thodarkadhai" was just or against the culture and traditions?

Last week, I attended a wedding of my classmate's son in Chennai.  This youngster, educated in the
U S , picked his own partner, an American, went through the day long rituals that was totally mixed with tradition, loud chanting of Vedas and Mantras by learned Priests from the Brahmin community, who struggled to pronounce the name of the bride but were seen happy to solemnize the marriage that cemented the bond in the marriage from India to the U S A.  The girl's parents were too eager to perform the rituals though they did not have any clue of Kulam or Gothram that is repeatedly chanted during the rituals.  Bare bodied, the Americans presented a look that was pleasing to the eyes and the on lookers like us immediately accepted their presence and  embraced them  to our fold.  The Americans did not have Poonal (sacred thread) that is considered as a basic step in the conduct of marriage amongst Hindu Brahmins!  They, however, wore Pancha gachham veshtis and the women in traditional silk Sarees that added color and sheen to the function.  The marriage of hearts concluded and everyone present there were happy to taste the delicacies of South Indian cuisine and left happily.

On the flip side, I am puzzled over a subject of controversy triggered by one of the 5 gurus of Hindu cult that follows Shankaracharya, subscribe to their Peetams or abodes and views.  My friend's daughter who is a Tamil Brahmin, deeply in love with a Classmate of hers from the school and vice versa are now settled in the U S since the past several years continuing to foster their love and affection ever since.

Now that they are nearing the end of their 20s they approached their respective parents and expressed their interests of getting married as they knew each other for more than 12-15 years, pleading and swearing  that their love is genuine!  The boy's father decided to meet the Guru and seek his approval as both the boy and the girl belonged to the same Gothram! The Guru trashed the idea of getting married into the same Gothra!  The  Guru replied that he will not support marriage in same Gothra when the father asked the Guru if there was any way out to make this marriage happen? Now that the Guru was in no mood to approve the match, the Boy's parents are up with a dagger against the girl and her parents and give emotional  threats if they proceeded with the wed lock!  They boy is in a huge dilemma as to whom to support  if he had to choose between his lady love and his parents.  The boy who had come up with a mind of getting engaged left without even proposing!  The girl is shattered and trying to reconcile hard to the new equation of life  missing someone with whom she has been in touch and love since the past 12-15 years!

The parents of the girl are so upset with the boy that he was unable to take a decision and pondered if he would bring this topic over and over again with their daughter accusing her of splitting the family, if at all they get married? The boy's parents are happy that their son left without getting engaged or married against their wishes and that they could get him married to a girl of their choice.  Both the houses represent a scene of repentance and the family shattered.

A small stand taken by the Religious Guru resulted in complications and tensions in the hearts of so many in the families.  The friends of the family are in state of disbelief that something like this could happen during this modern era where people are educated and moving forward both economically and socially!   Hearts that yearn and love  each other is the real marriage and not the one where the hearts don't match but the parents force it on to the children making an unpleasant happening.  I have known several people getting married outside the cast and living happy, outside the boundaries of community and religion but married happily!  The priests performed the Indo-American Marriage last week happily and what does the Guru has to say about this happening? will he ostracize the priests for having indulged in Anti-religious activities and shun them from the title of Priests to perform rituals connected with Hinduism in the future? Our religious heads must evolve and accept such marriage of hearts and bless them instead of creating disturbances in the families that will lead the younger generation to unsubscribe to believing such religious Gurus  and their abodes that exists only on the foundation of trust by people. The recent arrest of self styled god man Asa ram Bapu has raised many eyebrows and question the basics of our trust in Religious cult. Time is not far off when these Mutts and religious heads will have to bow to the ever changing wants and living of the society and find some means to evolve whereby both the belief and trust in Religion are  maintained and fostered well to peculate the benefits to the future generations.

Marriage as an institution is in grave danger these days looking at the level of independence that is enjoyed by both the boy and the girl.  Many arranged marriages have failed and many love marriages have also failed.  True love is the one that sustains the weather of times and stands by each other!  In order to protect the institution of marriage, the Gurus will have to adapt to the new circumstances and not get frozen away in time.  When Love emerges supreme, the Gurus must bless them and encourage them to forge into an alliance of marriage as that is the only way legacy can be nourished and protected.

This Thodarkadhai has to find solutions soon and there is need for society to discuss and debate about it.  Every story has to end and it will be extra ordinary to see the same end well!  Will our religious leaders and society change for good, better and the best?

Hindu Dharma Paripalana Trust, Besant Nagar

                                      Hindu Dharma Paripalana Trust, Besant Nagar, Chennai

This trust was formed mainly to help Brahmin's in performing the religious rites of departed souls, situated next to the Besant Nagar crematorium in Chennai.  The Charity trust has rooms where one can perform according to Vedic rites for which they charge a fee of Rs 1000/- per day(3-4 hours).

Today, There was a death in my friend's family. A friend who lost his dear sister battling the dreaded Cancer.  After the cremation, the Pandit/ Shastrigal suggested that we book the accommodation for the 10th, 11th and 12th day rituals connected by paying the necessary advance amount of RS 4000/- to the Hindu Dharma Paripalana Trust.  I sent my assistant to do the necessary booking.  He came back with a form asking details about the person dead, the name, address and tel no of the performer of rites and other details and demanded Rs 12000/- for confirming booking.  The mental condition and stability of a person standing on the Cremation ground, emotions pouring out and looking lost is not in a position to think of anything else other than paying whatever is demanded by the Trust administrators.  Accordingly, an amount of RS 12000/- was sent through the assistant who came back with an official receipt for RS 4000/- and a scribble at the back stating Rs8000/- without any details or signature of any one who have accepted the money.

I decided to confront the Trust that boasts of Hindu Paripalanam which can be understood as protection to Hinduism or propagating Hinduism as to how and why they have issued money receipt for only Rs 4000/- instead of RS 12000/- that they collected?

I got the shock of my life when I saw for the first time dozens of Iyers and Iyengars standing and working together with full co-operation when in reality it is otherwise?  When I asked the Iyengar Priest- looking fellow about the anomaly I found in the receipt, he snapped at me saying its how this functions!  When I introduced myself  belonging to Aam Aadmi Party,  he summoned another guy who had horizontal stripes of ashes on his forehead who intercepted me asking if I could  ask the same question to the priest who conducts the last rituals and whether I demand receipt from him?  I was baffled with the way they argued with me adamantly saying that receipt for the balance amount of RS 8000/- charged for paying to their workers can not be given.  In the meantime, 3-4 more horizontals and verticals joined them and started arguing with me at the top of their voice defending the extra amount taken by them for which receipt was not issued.  I simply said I don't mind paying the amount but all that I need is a receipt. I asked for the Trustee's name and telephone number and very promptly came the reply that he was in the U S.  I told them that a trust will have more than a trustee and asked for other names and telephone numbers.  Fearing a lost battle, they asked me if I would like to cancel the booking and take refund of the entire amount paid?  I replied in negative and warned them that this kind of attitude will not find favours with the on coming generations and ultimately, they will stand as a cause for the downfall of Hindutva and Dharma!  The cumulative sin of destroying Dharma and Satya will rest upon them portraying as Priests but doing activities that belittle them.

Becoming nervous, he opened the drawer and returned the extra amount of RS 8000/- charged saying that he will collect the same from our priest when he comes there for the rituals!

What surprises me is the co-operative  joint operation of this racket by both Iyengars and Iyers alike who have formed their own club to fleece people who come there bundled in emotional reservoirs and whose thinking capacity is reduced to minimal due to circumstances.  These crooks know that people charged with emotions will not think or hesitate to spend and strike at this opportunity to rob them!
There is absolutely no difference between a road side chain snatcher and the Brahman administrators of Hindu Dharma Paripalana Trust at Besant Nagar.  Hope wisdom dawns on them with god's grace?
May these people turn into human friendly and act as messenger of gods specially considering the noble service attached with the rituals for the departed souls!

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